"Zayn was sexy today #confirmed"
 "...and Lou gave the girl such a sassy look that 'peasant' was permanently burned into her forehead"
 "Niall laughed a few minutes ago, that's why the sun is out right now #confirmed"
 "Harry's hair defied more of the laws of physics today, but he still looked like a sex god #confirmed"
 "Liam has joined the quiff movement. That is all."
 "Here's a picture of Paul today. Just kidding, Paul has a picture of you. #paulwayswatching"
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